Part 2: Husband’s vs.Wives

So I wanted to dig a bit deeper into relationships. I SAY THIS OUT OF LOVE! ! As iron sharpens iron.(Proverbs 27:17) I’ve gone through enough stuff in my past 3 relationships spanning just about 15 yrs…. learning and growing each time with Jesus. Watching my parents fall apart and now recognizing traits in both the female and male roles played out first hand around me. First to clarify I AM NOT PERFECT. I will protect and defend my guy to no end and yet I will be argumentative at times,  I do have trouble with full submission, etc. I’m a handful. From Part 1, it is clear that there is an action that causes a reaction. Wife first has respect and submit to the husband before she receives unconditional love. I have encountered woman that have everything wrong totally. Married and not having sex with their husbands. UMMMM  excuse me, I don’t know who you think you are but your body doesn’t belong to you. Married and not catering to their husband.  Not doing his laundry or cooking …. even turning down dates. Do you know what this spoiled brat, selfish, self-centered, bigotry does to your husband? To your marriage? What about never supporting him?  Never helping him?  Never being there for him?  Comparing and complaining? You are punching holes in who he is as a man. Proverbs 25:24 & 21:9 state that it is better to live outside of the house on a corner of a roof than in a house with a nagging wife. OUTSIDE…. ON A ROOF…subject to the weather and lack of comfort than to even see you inside a spacious house and deal with you as a nagging complaining wife. Why would he stay with you ladies? I’m all about being a strong woman,  and standing for something and what I believe in…. and no lie I struggle with OBEDIENCE… Do ALL THINGS as if unto the Lord (Ephesians 6:7, Colos. 3:23) ladies you are specifically instructed to treat your husbands as it is fit unto God. (Colos.3:18) It starts with YOU WIVES. Most girls today are defiant,  demanding,  self serving, self centered,spoiled brats…. including myself. Expecting a husband to do what we say, know what we’re thinking,  give us all his time and never work yet be the provider of the family. I’ve literally  watched a chick (I can’t bring myself to call her a woman or even a lady) be a two timing, fake as can be, ill intentioned, back stabbing wife and never (as far as I know) cheat on her husband and go to church and “pray for answers”. Then when he finally took a stand and said enough, she plays a victim.WHAAAT IS YOUR MALFUNCTION LITTLE GIRL?!? You can’t not touch your husband for years and think he’ll sick around.  You can’t not ask him how his day was or help him with things so that he can give you more family time that you’ve been asking for.  You can’t not clean the flipping house and expect him to rub your back. SERIOUSLY…. ladies… if you don’t think that catering and tending to your husband and putting him BEFORE your kids is an ABSOLUTE  COMMAND from God then leave.  No questions, no problems, no attachment  just pack your crap and leave. Your A terrible example to your kids and to others and the world that knows you of what a good wife and woman is. If this offends you then you don’t know Jesus, period. If you aren’t in total agreement with me then you’re not reading the Word and therefore not in agreement with God. Is a hard pill to swallow and we choke on it almost every time…. pill called TRUTH. We allow pride and arrogance to consume us.  The most selfish thing in the world is play victim. OHHHH MY MAN LEFT ME. … OHHHH HE WAS NO GOOD. … OHHHH HE BROKE HIS PROMISES/VOWS….. my response is STUPID IT’S YOUR FAULT.(this isn’t the case for every relationship, if he beats you,  cheats on you,  talks down to you,  scares you,  belittles you, etc… his fault totally leave and if applicable  have him arrested)  Your husband didn’t marry you for you to try, or to accomplish demasculine him. For you to literally break the bank, the house,and your marriage. Through sickness and health, unless you have a psychological meltdown and need Dr’s to help heal your mental status, no forms of 2 faced actions fall under this.  Talking bad about your husband and never to him is not a form of sickness covered under the vows of marriage.  For richer or poorer, this doesn’t mean if you never work and max out the credit cards.  This doesn’t mean disregard the budget. This doesn’t mean act stupid when he asks you to stick to one. First question is are you working?  Are you helping him to reach financial goals? If all your doing is complaining about it #norespect! For better or worse, if he lost his job and you lost everything (house, car, food,etc) you stick with him and support him. Help him and bring him peace not strife. If you are an added stress you bring every type of evil to him and to your marriage. (James 3:16,Roman 1:29) Ladies, I have my own struggles with this as well.  I knew well enough to recognize it and take it to Jesus, go back and at least try and make it right. Can’t take back something you’ve already put out… can only try to make it right and work on your problems with Jesus for the future. Get ready ladies. … part 3 is coming soon.

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Part 1: Wives vs. Husbands

Ephesians 5:21-25 (KJV)

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

So something I have really honed in on is something I didn’t fully notice before I met Shane. I am a woman, a mother, at one point a wife. Everything I say in this is out of love, though surely there will be some that have ill feelings towards it. In the scripture above it speaks of the roles of a husband an wife. Now, if you truly know Jesus and love God you know that He is PERFECT and EXACT and God of ORDER. So exactly as it is written. In marriage you are instructed  to SUBMIT to EACH OTHER  in fear of God. Meaning, that it is a requirement to regard your spouse before yourself. Then in EXACT ORDER…… WIVES SUBMIT yourselves unto your husbands, as unto the Lord. WHHHAAAATTT?!?!?!?! What does it mean to be submitted to God? What does it mean to submit? FULL and TOTAL SURRENDER of ones well being, body, possessions, and ENTIRE life. That’s ridiculous you ladies might say….. totally allow a man to dictate my life? Are you crazy?…. HAHAHAHA God answers that in EXACT ORDER. For the Husband is the HEAD of the wife. EXACT ORDER of LIFE…. GOD, HUSBAND, WIFE, KIDS, House. Ladies, this means that in direct reflection to your marriage and house hold lands not on your husbands shoulders…. but YOURS. He is to lead you are to follow. Have you ever tried moving your body in a particular direction but not your head? Your body cannot walk away from the direction the head is going. Have you tried to keep your body upright yet tilt your head way back? Your body follows the direction of the head no matter if you wanted it to or not. In EXACT ORDER the scripture continues… even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the Saviour of the body. THEREFORE as the church is SUBJECT UNTO Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands IN EVERYTHING. WHAT??? Did GOD just say that?!?!?! YES!!! What women don’t get, is that this is the FIRST things that MUST be done BEFORE the husband gives love to the wife. And YES I just went there. God designed it this way end of story. In EXACT ORDER, husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it. This is where the husband cherishes, adores, protects, provides, and laces his wife fulfilling her in every way. See your husband operates on respect, while the wife operates on love. Ask any man if he rather have love or respect more…. Respect is the number 1 answer. He has the weight of God on him. designed by God, your husband is to lead the wife and children to Jesus. He is to the decision maker, the provider, the protector, and the LEADER. Everything that transpires from his house he is responsible for and that INCLUDES the wife. Don’t get it twisted ladies this doesn’t mean you control things from the background or that you can act any type of way.  This means he leads you follow. Don’t jump the gun gentleman this doesn’t give you authority to do as you please either. ABSOLUTE PARTNERSHIP in a marriage. Give and take. YET, as the wife your feelings and thoughts have value and merit…. wait for it…. THE ULTIMATE DECISION IS FROM THE HUSBAND!!! (DANG I Just said that) YES!!! That is why God reprimands the the husband as well as the wife when the wife jacks up. Guy’s you may be saying THAT’S NOT FAIR. Hey, your the leader and the head ….. we follow you. (to be continued)