I am going to share with you something that I have felt God calling me to do but it has not be the right timing. Today was a big day. I broke. First time in a very long time I broke into such a rage that the body tremors lasted almost half a day. God made me very different than my family. Like most of the population I came from what would be considered a “broken home”. Divorced parents and of course each of them having their crazy to deal with. We all have our faults, I found no reason to speak about them. As I get older and the more I know and understand God the more I see. The more you see the more you understand. The more you understand your tolerance level for BS you take. my first conversation with God was at the age of 4. I would sneak off into the second living room we had and just talk with Him for hours. Once taking the pennies I had and holding them up to ceiling telling Him to take it. Not realizing that what I was doing was Biblical. I was more open to Him at the age of 4 than anyone else in my family combined. Over the years I have strayed and come back to Jesus as different milestones happened. My parents divorce made me the most committed to the church I was attending until I started dating my ex husband whom had literally forced me to choose between him and God at one point. I fell away from God for many years to find my life empty and meaningless. A brand new baby and move to Texas and I came running back to God with tenacity and famished hunger. I divorced my ex husband and slipped up here and there but you can never un-know things. By this point, I could never not hear God I could only choose whether to obey Him or not. So 1 surprise pregnancy at the same time of a bad break up and I choose to become extremely devoted to Him once again. A series of divine events took place. I randomly met Shane, I had a string of jobs each better than the last, my first and worst car accident where I was at fault quickly followed by a second. My newest chiropractor hired me on the spot as he was adjusting me from my accident. Shane taught me so much but he was battling his own demons and God brought him home sooner rather than later. Soon after I met my now fiance who was a patient in the Dr. office I was managing. At first he was my business partner and closest mentor, then it developed into us being inseparable. There hasn’t been a day since we started this adventure where we haven’t been together. The more you seek Him and understand Him the faster He moves in your life. This is so crazy, My original content of this post was entirely something else, this must be for someone reading this. I was going to explain what happened today to cause me to break but God wanted something else to come out. When you understand that you as a human can never ever be good enough to deserve God to be good to you, and you accept Him for the almighty God He is, then will you see just how quickly He moves on your behalf. Even if it seems bad at the time. (Romans 8:28) I want to know God so intimately, because of that He moved me to where I wanted to be and He needed me to be within a year. I recently have been adjusting to the few businesses we now have and the blending of the families while dealing with the negativity of the outside world. By His grace and mercy with me I am still standing and alive. Today I was deeply seeded with feelings and thought that what I feel now and what I am dealing with is to prep me for the task He has assigned me for my future. Moses had to live in the wilderness of the desert and learn how to survive first before he could lead a population through it. (Exodus 2:1-15) The faster you understand there is absolutely nothing you can do to be good enough or to “make” God do the thing you are praying for, the faster you’ll see Him taking you from where you are to where you never thought you’d be. Trust Him fully to not worry or have fear. This is piggy backing off what I was saying yesterday. Obey Him when you hear Him or discern His will. I lost many years of my life that I wish I could take back and give to Him. This life is so much better. I mean a thrill and joy and excitement beyond any amount of partying a person can have. Never feeling alone or unloved, even when you have been pushed to breaking point and sitting in your walk in closet bursting into a hard cry because you know the gravity of what you just had to do to fight for your family and their equality. Or that one time you where fully aware that you where overdosed and had to pray to God your heart didn’t explode. Guys I’m telling you I have pretty much been through it all. Not once did God ever leave me, He was merciful enough to not let me die that way. For sure would have not been in Heaven. He loved me enough to pick me up and clean me off and give me value and meaning and most of all PURPOSE. I am going to do something I have never done before. I am going to give all of you my email address. I encourage you guys to ask me questions about Jesus, just have conversations, if you just need to talk, to ask for prayers, etc. My email is PerfectPersonForTheJob@gmail.com I look forward to connecting with you guys!!!
So I wanted to dig a bit deeper into relationships. I SAY THIS OUT OF LOVE! ! As iron sharpens iron.(Proverbs 27:17) I’ve gone through enough stuff in my past 3 relationships spanning just about 15 yrs…. learning and growing each time with Jesus. Watching my parents fall apart and now recognizing traits in both the female and male roles played out first hand around me. First to clarify I AM NOT PERFECT. I will protect and defend my guy to no end and yet I will be argumentative at times, I do have trouble with full submission, etc. I’m a handful. From Part 1, it is clear that there is an action that causes a reaction. Wife first has respect and submit to the husband before she receives unconditional love. I have encountered woman that have everything wrong totally. Married and not having sex with their husbands. UMMMM excuse me, I don’t know who you think you are but your body doesn’t belong to you. Married and not catering to their husband. Not doing his laundry or cooking …. even turning down dates. Do you know what this spoiled brat, selfish, self-centered, bigotry does to your husband? To your marriage? What about never supporting him? Never helping him? Never being there for him? Comparing and complaining? You are punching holes in who he is as a man. Proverbs 25:24 & 21:9 state that it is better to live outside of the house on a corner of a roof than in a house with a nagging wife. OUTSIDE…. ON A ROOF…subject to the weather and lack of comfort than to even see you inside a spacious house and deal with you as a nagging complaining wife. Why would he stay with you ladies? I’m all about being a strong woman, and standing for something and what I believe in…. and no lie I struggle with OBEDIENCE… Do ALL THINGS as if unto the Lord (Ephesians 6:7, Colos. 3:23) ladies you are specifically instructed to treat your husbands as it is fit unto God. (Colos.3:18) It starts with YOU WIVES. Most girls today are defiant, demanding, self serving, self centered,spoiled brats…. including myself. Expecting a husband to do what we say, know what we’re thinking, give us all his time and never work yet be the provider of the family. I’ve literally watched a chick (I can’t bring myself to call her a woman or even a lady) be a two timing, fake as can be, ill intentioned, back stabbing wife and never (as far as I know) cheat on her husband and go to church and “pray for answers”. Then when he finally took a stand and said enough, she plays a victim.WHAAAT IS YOUR MALFUNCTION LITTLE GIRL?!? You can’t not touch your husband for years and think he’ll sick around. You can’t not ask him how his day was or help him with things so that he can give you more family time that you’ve been asking for. You can’t not clean the flipping house and expect him to rub your back. SERIOUSLY…. ladies… if you don’t think that catering and tending to your husband and putting him BEFORE your kids is an ABSOLUTE COMMAND from God then leave. No questions, no problems, no attachment just pack your crap and leave. Your A terrible example to your kids and to others and the world that knows you of what a good wife and woman is. If this offends you then you don’t know Jesus, period. If you aren’t in total agreement with me then you’re not reading the Word and therefore not in agreement with God. Is a hard pill to swallow and we choke on it almost every time…. pill called TRUTH. We allow pride and arrogance to consume us. The most selfish thing in the world is play victim. OHHHH MY MAN LEFT ME. … OHHHH HE WAS NO GOOD. … OHHHH HE BROKE HIS PROMISES/VOWS….. my response is STUPID IT’S YOUR FAULT.(this isn’t the case for every relationship, if he beats you, cheats on you, talks down to you, scares you, belittles you, etc… his fault totally leave and if applicable have him arrested) Your husband didn’t marry you for you to try, or to accomplish demasculine him. For you to literally break the bank, the house,and your marriage. Through sickness and health, unless you have a psychological meltdown and need Dr’s to help heal your mental status, no forms of 2 faced actions fall under this. Talking bad about your husband and never to him is not a form of sickness covered under the vows of marriage. For richer or poorer, this doesn’t mean if you never work and max out the credit cards. This doesn’t mean disregard the budget. This doesn’t mean act stupid when he asks you to stick to one. First question is are you working? Are you helping him to reach financial goals? If all your doing is complaining about it #norespect! For better or worse, if he lost his job and you lost everything (house, car, food,etc) you stick with him and support him. Help him and bring him peace not strife. If you are an added stress you bring every type of evil to him and to your marriage. (James 3:16,Roman 1:29) Ladies, I have my own struggles with this as well. I knew well enough to recognize it and take it to Jesus, go back and at least try and make it right. Can’t take back something you’ve already put out… can only try to make it right and work on your problems with Jesus for the future. Get ready ladies. … part 3 is coming soon.
Isaiah 58:11 – 12 (KJV)
11 And the Lord shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not. 12 And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in.
I feel this this pull, God reminding me at every corner how my calling is for Him. I love Him so much. I am not sure how you guys feel about christian dubstep / house music but it is pretty awesome. I am HUGE HUGE music person. I have trained to sing and dance since I was 4. God will use these talents one day soon. (1 Peter 4:10) I find myself falling in love with Jesus over and over again. Remember that we are the BRIDE of Christ. there is a ROMANCE that transpires. (Gen. 28:10-22, Exod. 3:1-17, John 21:15, John1:29, Ephis. 5:27) God is so AMAZING guys. You can’t tell me there is no water in a pool I’m already swimming in. He continually is lifting me up when I feel abandoned and unsure. With my business and in my life I have been overlooking the progress and being thankful for what is happening. Feeling like I need to be farther, and do more, and have faster results, etc. The fact that I am so selfish is so disheartening. How can I even be so ungrateful to my God? I love the romance I have with Jesus. Like my husband he ensures and encourages. Like my best friend He defends me, and lifts me up. Like my lover, He wraps around me and tenderly loves unconditionally. Being my God, He commands my life and graciously shows me how much I need Him every second of every day. Have you ever been so absorbed into something others called you obsessed? I have…Be obsessed with Jesus. Out of all the things I have been told I am “obsessed” with my favorite is JESUS. hahaha from fitness, to business….. my truest obsession is God. As I follow His path for my life, I have found so much happiness at the purest submission to God. Standing my ground even when I have oppressors and nay sayers. Jesus is who defines me, guides me and instructs my life. THANK GOD!!! Blinded by the light (Acts 9:1-19) now I can SEE for real!
Pray through all seasons Pray in all circumstances Continually Pray through suffering Intercede for those in pain With joy, fill the gaps “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Galatians 6:9 (NIV)
9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
I have been pressed to write more on my blog. I can’t lie, I have been distracted and caught up with my business. God is so awesome guys. No joke. i’m doing what is known as a run. A run in my business is when you put your head down and grind it out until you look up and your at the goal. My goal seems distant from me, because I set the bar to be at the top. Like life, everything is a roller coaster. I am going through every emotion every day multiple times a day. I have realized the rate of mindset in others and myself. I have recently been speaking to people around the world initiating conversations that are about business and Jesus just take over and the whole conversation roll into one about HIM!!! God is so good guys. I have neglected to write a blog in along while. God has reminded me multiple times. My daughter asked me when I would write one again because she follows it. Guys she is 9. I was taken aback, I really am slacking if my 9 year old is asking me when I was going to write again. A hard reminder to never forget that God has called me to also continue to keep this going. I have many testimonials to share from the last month or so. Places in which God shows me just how in doubt and times of struggling faith He will always be there. YES, I struggle in points of faith at times. During these points I blast the worship music and remember WHY I must keep pressing forward. My WHY is because God told me to do something. Guess what guys, because He told me to do it, I have the strongest driven passion for it. God will never ask you to do something that He didn’t create you for. He made you specifically to be who you are, to love what you love, to have specific skills and talents, and thought processes. He made you to use all of these to bring Him greater glory and be the fishers of men. (Matthew 4:19, John 21:4-17) All these things is the very thing that drives you, that pushes you, that brings you the greatest joy and happiness in life, what fulfills you and gives you reason to want to live. Don’t allow the enemy to lie to you, telling you that you are unhappy or miserable. GOD is greater. Greater is He that lives in me than he that lives of the the world. (1 John 4:4) What does this mean? This means that whatever you have going on, whatever circumstance is draining you God is greater. That negative husband, nagging wife, friend telling you that you aren’t going to make it, those waiting to see you fail, those who lie about you, or turn their backs to you. YOU BELONG TO GOD…. THAT MEANS YOU ARE UNSTOPPABLE!!! You can feel the hurt f the circumstance but you don’t break to it. I’ve more than taken my fair share before building this business and helping people change the direction of their life and family trees from poverty to wealth (in more ways than just financial). Now that I’m actually doing it I can’t even talk to my family about it, not because I don’t want to help them but because it’s me they want to not even know about it. So to that I say, Luke 4:24, Mark 6:4, Matthew 13:57. A prophet is not without honor EXCEPT in his own town.
16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
I am sorry guys I have been a little distant, I have been following the instructions of God. He lead me to an avenue that He wants me to use for His will. How many of us understand that when God is moving the enemy will try and deter the plans. Distract you from the Will of God. There have been so many messages that God has revealed to me while having conversations with people or watching them. How do you know a person??? By the fruit of their life!! Many things come into mind. First, how can you figure out a if a fruit is bad? Most times we can see it on the outside. Molding, rotten, and spoiled. Yet there are times when a fruit looks edible, then you bite into it and then you get a mouthful of rotten. How can you tell a person by their fruit?? Sometimes you can see it, blessings in abundance, by their character, by their demeanor, how they are with others. Other times, things seem good but once you break it open, taste it, experience it you realize that the inside doesn’t match the what appears. Know a person by their fruit!!! Sometimes that means having to observe it first hand. Pray for discernment, wisdom, POWER, and UNDERSTANDING. I say this for many reasons. Ask for this in the name of Jesus about the Word of God FIRST, then of others. When you have the understanding of the Word and the Power of God (literally), and the Wisdom and Discernment of the Scriptures then you can take it out into the world and stand without fault.
Matthew 16:12-18 (NIV)
13 When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, He asked His disciples, “Who do people say the Son of Man is?”14 They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”15 “But what about you?” He asked. “Who do you say I am?”16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”17 Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in Heaven. 18 And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hades will not overcome it.
In this Scripture, Jesus is stating that when we understand and get it correct. We stop missing the mark. We are in understanding with the Spirit of God. We have opened our heart and eyes to the the Truth. If something isn’t right then it’s wrong. Basic and as simple as that. When, God comes around then and He asks you who you follow, you should recognize who He is. Jesus also says that there is only one way to know that He is the Messiah, by the Holy Spirit.
Currently, I have a struggle in my life. God asked me this afternoon (about an hour ago honestly) when I was iterating with my co workers. ” How will they ever believe in the Cross if you conform to their standards?” BE OF THE KINGDOM!!! Do not have any doubt or hesitation for who you are representing to the world, when you are the ambassador for Jesus. At time it will get lonely, and the world will look at you crazy but GOD….. allow me to repeat…. BUT GOD is with you. I rather have God in my corner than any person. BE who you say you are in Jesus!!! LIVE who you say you are in Jesus!!! STAY in the Kingdom and forget the world.
So this hits the point to a “T”, how often do we as Christians ask God to speak to us? I can tell you that I have been here. I still get to this point at times. When I don’t want to put in the work to listen, and seek God to “just tell me”. Our lives become so busy. We get caught up in the aspect of living we forget to make time for God. B.I.B.L.E. BASIC INSTRUCTIONS BEFORE LEAVING EARTH. How many of you understand this? I was a “know it all” before meeting Shane. He had his work cut out with me. It took months of fighting and tears and praying before I finally asked God to open my eyes. And literally, right there on the spot at 10 p.m. at night sitting in my car, God shed the scales from eyes. When understanding hit me I wept. The Truth of correct doctrine is absolute. I had remorse for the hard time I gave Shane and subsequently Jesus Himself. Obedience is better than sacrifice.
1 Samuel 15:22 (KJV)
22 And Samuel said, Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams.
Depth and understanding comes when you read the Word of God. Ask for it! Anything you ask in the name of Jesus to Father God shall be done if you believe and do not doubt! God has been moving rapidly in this season of my life. Things that He seeded in me almost 10 years ago, now has a horizon. His will in my life is doing a hostile takeover!! As nervous as it makes me, I walk by faith. We all want to see the outcome! We all want to know the future. The truth is this……. we aren’t meant to know. THAT is the POINT of faith. Faith in God means faith in His timing.